Skip to main content

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

@Smc

It is such a worry when we see things deteriorating and our 24 hour standby mode is activated. In these times of crisis it is hard not to think the worst.  Am wondering if pdoc would want to admit her straight away given the increase in intensity of her symptoms.

 

I understand what you are saying about seeming pettiness when it comes to supporting loved ones vs a function  ... am feeling your exhaustion which comes with caring for someone with long term illness - looking after them, often at the expense of our own mental health, not getting in the quality time out we so desperately need, living grief as life is not how we imagined it should be.  There are times when others might be able to help with transport etc but you may feel you need to be there given recent events. 

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

@Former-Member, it's a private clinic, so I don't think they do emergency admissions as such. I'm wondering whether to ask Hubby's Dad if he could meet her off the country train and get her to and from the psychiatrist's appointment, but it feels like a lot to ask of him when he's carer for MIL too. We'll meet her on the trip back to drive her home to her house.

She's got a couple of good friends who have previously traveled with her to appointments, but neither is available this time. For an admission, I think it does need to be us with her.

 

Ooooh you're right about the grief. She's got some real creative skills, but the MI entangles her so much. And it's not just her. Hubby has trouble settling into his very creative trade due to interruptions and stresses. My pottery is on hold indefinitely, and we're really concerned about our Younger Daughter's anxiety levels. She's having trouble sleeping, trouble coping with school. She's at risk of failing some subjects, but having to repeat the year would make things even worse for her. (So yes, the parent teacher interviews are an absolute must-go.)

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

I understand reluctance but I would ask FIL @Smc, MI is bad enough, let alone having to do it on one's own. I am so pleased for you she does have insight and seems to be willing to accept family help which, when given appropriately, is well documented to result in better outcomes. As you know simple, yet significant gestures like Grandpa meeting at station can not only ensure attendance at appts but also it means she catches up with grandparent/s which in itself is lovely.

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

@Smc sorry things are so uncertain for you and your family at the moment. I wanted to say something last night but was not in a good space and could not or find the words.  I can relate to the realistic nightmares. I still have vivid memories of some of those 🙁 

Wish there was something I could say but wanted you to know I had seen your posts and thinking of you. 

 

 

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Thanks @Determined. Sometimes there's not an answer to give, but I appreciate the thoughts and empathy. I'd noticed your posts too... ditto here.

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Lots of feeling for you @Smc .... and lots of "me too" in terms of what others have said.

Heart Heart Heart

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Thanks. And am "watching" you too @Faith-and-Hope. We're all a bit under pressure at the moment in various ways.

 

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Am wondering how your daughter got on @Smc

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

@Former-Member, her day went well. She travelled safely, with her worst complaint being that she got a bit bored. The psychiatrist is ambivalent about whether or not an admission would be helpful, and is of the mind that the psychotic episodes are trauma related, so she's adjusted the doses of some existing medications for a two week trial period.

So I've got my "me-time" day back, which is a relief. And she'll be around for the party and its lead-up.

I'd put off posting about yesterday because I am really tired. Younger Daughter's doctors appointment and parent teacher interviews were helpful, but emotionally exhausting. Some of her subjects are fine- she's her usual happy helpful self. Others she's dropping behind a bit, and while the teachers are concerned about her work, they're even more concerned about her wellbeing. So we've filled them in to differing levels on why she's so under pressure at the moment. 

One teacher that she's been finding particularly hard to work with was actually very sympathetic. I think his approach to classroom discipline has jarred with our daughter somewhat, so am planning a discussion with her about how to work out some acceptable middle ground. Which, from my perspective, looks do-able.

And last teacher of the day turned out to be a real Godsend. She's taught Daughter both last year and this year, and had really noticed how unhappy she'd become... comes out in conversation that she spent a number of years working as a psych nurse, so suddenly WOW, we had someone who understood a brief clinical-terms description of what's going on with "big sis". It's so good when you find someone who "speaks the language", and you know that you don't have to try to explain a whole lot of complexities. We've suggested that it might be good for her to talk through some ideas with the student welfare lady who has been overseeing Younger's wellbeing. Really hope that comes together.

So today, I am totally drained. (Easy dinner coming up tonight!) Topping it all off, another Godsend moment. When heading down to our town bakery for bread this morning, we ran into a lady we know from the local arts community. One thing leading to another in conversation, it turns out that she spent years juggling care of ageing parents and a young adult daughter with MI... and the experience of having to put her artistic side into a holding pattern while doing so. Her parents are now gone, and her daughter has reached a more stable point in life, so both mother-and-daughter are moving forward in their respective lives, and picking up the "loose threads" of their creative pursuits.

Dunno... maybe I just really needed to see someone who's made it through the place we're currently in, and found out that the frayed ends of life do come back together out the other side of it.

Re: New Post: Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Hugs @Smc

I have also been wondering how it was all going.