Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

hey @Former-Member would you maybe like to start your own thread then we can help you through all of your issues that your struggling with? feel free to tage me ill be happy to help where i can 🙂

[BlueBay]

Good to know @Former-Member
It must be hard when you're struggling so much and things trigger you too. Have you thought of keeping a journal and just writing whatever you think and feel at the time. That way you can show your psychologist.
Take care be kind to yourself.
❤😊

[Former-Member]

Sorry that you're struggling so much, its hard to feel like everything is so hard. 😞 Opening up the box of stuff that hasnt been dealt with is so overwhelming. are you ok right now? Remember that there is lifeline if you need some one to one support, or keep talking here, we're listening.

lj

[Former-Member]

Hi @BlueBay

Every post I read on here is triggering because I have experienced a lot of what others struggle with on here myself. Especially when others express their pain of child sexual and mental/physical abuse and/or an attempt on their lives, as I am a child abuse survivor of such. Very triggering.

So how do I cope with my triggers on here?. By seeking others welfare over my own at that time, putting my own feelings aside to help them in the true spirit of support. I don't allow their pain to become about me. That's robbing them of support that is invited here. Instead of letting my own triggers upset me I use that pain to be able to relate and empathise with others. This actually helps heal my inner pain and anguish. 

Opening the pandora box of triggers within guidelines will just go around and around causing more distress and stigma. As where does it end if everyone is triggered - to suppressing our pain and not speaking about it.

If we can't cope with other people's distress that may trigger the best way to cope is to not read their threads on a mental health support forum until we feel strong enough to give back; - as all have suffered something horrific to be in the position to post on here in the first place so "all posts are potentially triggering"..and if within guidelines does not give me or another a right to criticise them or their posts and further their distress for doing simply what is invited to do on this forum. That is how I look at it and cope with triggers

If members become too worried to open up here and express their feelings that adhere to guidelines because it may upset and trigger someone unintentionally, then they simply will not post anymore and won't receive the support they need. That then disadvantages them. And for those latter reasons the forum will slowly lose the safe supportive environment for "all" as people will become to worried to share, members will dwindle off and the forum will not be effective towards its stated mission goals.

[Former-Member]

@Former-Member, this isn't my thread, but I don't find being told not to come on here helpful. I've started my own thread, but within the conversation here, I am seeking genuine methods others use to cope.

When I'm triggered I'm not talking about being 'upset' or 'distressed' I'm talking about ptsd type flashbacks. Immediate, high intensity, flight or fight responses, not something that being compassionate to others will modulate. It's like a slap in the face and you've been winded at the same time. They pick you up before you can take a breath and place you directly back into the hellish situation that brought me to the forums in the first place. You can't breathe, you can't run, you can't type, you're just stuck there in hell. It's not about taking someone's words and making it about me, it's a physiological response that I cannot control. 

I also suffer from triggers in everyday life from more benign sources and it's hard to cope with that every day too.

I think this is an entirely valid and justifiable question and completely appropriate to have on here.

And being told that if I cannot cope then I'm not welcome on the forums is very confronting.

I posted in this thread cause I genuinely wanted to know how other's coped with these things and I think I was entirely within my rights to do so. 

Maybe these forums are NOT the right place for me?

[Former-Member]

 I was explaining how I cope with triggers as the question asked. That is "my way of coping" by not reading others threads if I feel vulnerable at that time. INo one suggested no one is welcomed. We all have different ways of coping and that is mine and I have every right to express such. 

[BlueBay]

Have I caused an upset within this forum with my post?

Pls mods (whoever is on pls email me)

If i have upset you @Former-Member I am sorry.  All i was doing was asking how others cope with triggers? Maybe i have read this wrong, it could just be me.

I thought my question and post was a valid question.

i am really sorry if i have caused any upset or triggered anyone.

Bluebay

[Former-Member]

No @BlueBay, you haven't done anything.

[Former-Member]

There is no problem or upset my end @BlueBay. I just answered your question as to how "I" cope with triggers 😀

[BlueBay]

@Former-Member @Former-Member

That's good, 🙂 i was having a 'paranoia moment' that i was thinking you guys were angry with me for posting this post.

I'm sorry, i think i am tired and not reading things properly.

Upsetting people on here is the last thing i would ever do.

Take care both of you xxxooo