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pc1954
Casual Contributor

Daughter bi-polar had psychotic episode and I'm scared

My 36 yr old daughter lives with me. She has been diagnosed bi-polar borderline schizophrenic and has had 3 psychotic episodes in the last 3 years that required hospitalization. She is on disability but her check is not enough to support her so she lives with me. The first 2 breaks occurred outside of the house in the yard, but the last one, 4am Friday, happened in the house, with her 9 year old daughter.

The first 2 unnerved me, but I handled them and was OK by the next day. This time, every time I even think about it I start shaking or crying. She really scared me. I know she can't help it, but I'm afraid what she might do with another one. How do you handle them and get them to calm down when they only see you as the enemy and want you to go away or attack you? I've always felt like I was walking on eggshells with her, but now...I'm scared, but I love her. 

4 REPLIES 4

Re: Daughter bi-polar had psychotic episode and I'm scared

Good morning @pc1954

 

Feeling scared when our loved ones have psychotic breaks is a natural response, particularly when it results in risky behaviours.

 

Caring is a tough gig and it sounds like you are doing things a little bit tough at the moment.

Have you been able to access some dedicated MH carer support?  Carers Australia is a good starting spot and they offer free counseling services to carers. If you let me know what state you are in I can send some links to other groups that could help.

 

Feeling as though we are the enemy is common, despite the enormous amount of support we give. Since being on the forums I have noticed that a lot of patients feel as though we side with the docs to the exclusion of their feelings. I think this is partly due to us being concerned with med compliance (understandable as we don't want them to relapse). After learning a lot about MI, going to some carer support, I realised I needed to change the way I communicated with Mr Darcy and very much let him know I was on his team. I empathised with him as to med side effects, worked on solutions to minimise these (ie healthy eating, exercise) encouraged holistic health care i.e. exercise, social things, did emphasize the importance of working with pdoc, taking meds as agreed and any med change/discontinuation needed to be done in consultation with them. This helped our relationship no end.

 

I noticed that I needed to do some of these things myself too - the healthy eating naturally followed as we eat together, but as with a lot of carers I had not looked after myself and am finally attending to my teeth, secret women's business issues etc. I see a counselor to help me with coping mechanisms.

 

I will tag you in some 'self care' threads and introduce you to some other carers in our virtual cafe where we have more light hearted interactions.

 

Re: Daughter bi-polar had psychotic episode and I'm scared

Thanks for the quick response. I will check out the links you shared with me and try to organize my thoughts so I can be ready when she comes home.

I joined this forum before I realized its in Australia...I'm in the United States so I'm sure I don't qualify for the programs you mentioned. But I'm sure we must have something along the same lines here..I just have to find them.

Re: Daughter bi-polar had psychotic episode and I'm scared

@pc1954

I found the US based 'Fresh hope for Mental health' website so very helpful and they are inclusive of caregivers. They have support groups - this is a link to their tenets (and website).  Please do not be put off by the religious bit. The carer tenets are ever so helpful.

 

https://freshhope.us/about-fresh-hope/

Re: Daughter bi-polar had psychotic episode and I'm scared

Is she on medication? U can’t deal with this on ur own and it’s not fair to that little girl...
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