Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[BPDSurvivor]

---

@destructive wrote:

I think about that too @BPDSurvivor as someone who everyone says I have trauma but I don't know exactly what that is. It's confusing and do t know how to get better

---

@destructive , totally true! For years I've been told I suffer from cPTSD from my treating team because of the way I was treated as a child. However, when I look back, it was my 'normal'.

@Cathyblueknot made a good point. 'Trauma' is also a label. So yes, I do believe it is about working with the current struggles an individual exhibits.

[destructive]

I didn't realise there was too either. 
still helpful though, memory stuff is relevant for me

[destructive]

I didn't realise there was two either. 
still helpful though, memory stuff is relevant for me

[Daisydreamer]

---

@greenpea wrote:

@Daisydreamer....... I am not coping well with trauma atm but keep trying by seeing my psychiatrist, mental health nurse, exercising and being in touch with my Sane online friends.

---

@greenpea💚  💚  💚  
It sounds like you are doing everything you can during a difficult time! I am glad that your forum friends can be there for you when you need them

[greenpea]

@Malinka  Thanks Malinka 😄

[Adge]

I have Traumatic Amnesia, from over 20 years of trauma @Cathyblueknot 

Thanks for describing that.

I always retained (never forgot) the worst bits.

Adge

[Daisydreamer]

For many of us who have experienced trauma, or are supporting loved ones who are survivors of trauma, these questions about memory come up a lot, and understanding the difference between implicit and explicit memories is really helpful. It makes sense now why something in our environment can trigger memories.

I also felt a real sense of validation in this sentence @Cathyblueknot: “Some people recover some of these memories later on, triggered into the past memory. These are called recovered memories and research has shown that recovered memories are as reliable as memories which have never been forgotten”.

We heard questions from the community about recovering memory or trusting the memories that come back when triggers are present, and to hear that these memories are valid and reliable is very powerful.

[greenpea]

@Cathyblueknot  Cathyblueknot how do you cope with memories which are so awful and so full of guilt that you keep pushing them back trying to eradicate them?

[MissTreated]

@greenpea. Say if I left the marriage and kids moved away, wouldn't the partner with cPTSD feel like wear they feel is validated in some ways ie that no one cares? But ironically they're one one who pushed them away (speaking from my own experience). Do partners with cPTSD realise they are hurting the carers/family? My partner (with cPTSD and ?BPD) refuses he has issues and believes in trying to 'blame' him for what he feels. I feel misunderstood, accused and exhausted and not sure how else to help him.

[destructive]

is that when you can like react really strongly to something and not really know why? Has been happening more and more for me. So confusing and distressing then you just feel stupid for over

reActing